Finding balance is always challenging, but it wasn’t until I started paying attention to where I thought I was adding that I realized what I actually needed was subtraction.

A lot of these things looked positive on the surface. Fun, convenient, productive, social, aspirational, even “self-care” in some ways. And individually, none of them felt dramatic enough to question.

But together, they were quietly creating chaos.

More decisions to make. More money being spent. More overstimulation. More clutter. More pressure to keep up with routines, plans, trends, products, and expectations that didn’t necessarily make life better, they just made it fuller.

And eventually I realized that while life wasn’t going to become less busy, it could function better with a little more structure and a little less working against me.

Buying outfits for every occasion

I used to buy very specifically for events, dinners, concerts, weekends, trips, all of it. Not because my style was constantly changing, but because it felt like every occasion needed its own outfit.

Over time, I realized I was buying too much for the moment instead of for longevity. Pieces that photographed well or fit a very specific vibe, but didn’t necessarily integrate back into my actual wardrobe long term. And don’t get me wrong, if that moment calls for a wear it once moment, then that’s ok too, but it was the logistics, shopping and time that became the issue - not the clothes.

Now I shop much more responsibly and focus on pieces I know I’ll realistically wear repeatedly and in multiple ways. And for the occasions where I want something trend-driven, fun, or different, I lean much more on services like Rent the Runway and Vivrelle. Less pressure, money and honestly, more fun.

It still gives me the twist of fashion and getting dressed up without constantly consuming more or creating a closet full of pieces that only work once.

Trying every skincare product everyone else was using

At one point I had entirely too many skincare products. Too many steps, too many actives, too many things promising some kind of overnight transformation. A lot of it was being sent to me and while I’m grateful for it, I soon realized that there wasn’t a possible outcome to fit it all in.

Hundreds of products and the best formulas but somehow my skin looked worse.

I also finally stopped using makeup wipes after years of pretending they weren’t breaking me out when they absolutely were.

I think social media and beauty marketing can make it feel like everyone has a complicated routine, and if you’re not layering twelve products every night looking like a glazed donut, you’re somehow behind. But most of the time, my skin responds much better to consistency than complexity.

Now I use far fewer products, stick to what actually works for me, and my skin has honestly never looked better. Do we want a favorites post?

Thinking exhaustion meant I was productive

For years, I fully convinced myself I was “more creative at night.”

And sometimes I probably was. But I also think I was exhausted more often than I realized.

Late nights started feeling productive simply because they were quiet. Fewer emails, fewer expectations, fewer people needing things from you. But eventually I realized I wasn’t actually functioning better, I was just functioning alone.

Once I started prioritizing sleep and building an actual nighttime routine, everything shifted. My focus improved, my mood improved, my creativity improved, and honestly, so did my ability to handle stress.

Turns out being tired all the time wasn’t actually part of my personality and doesn’t equate to success.

Spontaneous date nights

I used to romanticize spontaneity a lot more than I realistically had the capacity for.

Last-minute dinner plans, squeezing in one more night out after a long work day, saying yes because it sounded fun in the moment. And sometimes it was. But other times it just left me wondering if having no plans would’ve been better.

I think there’s this idea that spontaneity automatically makes life more exciting, but I’ve realized I enjoy things much more when they actually fit into my life instead of disrupting it. Believe me, there is nothing I love more than trying a new restaurant or spending the evening in a booth with my husband and a bottle of wine, but we realized that it was more about the intention of making the plan than the actual date.

What if someone had a tough day at work? What if staying home and watching a movie felt more appealing in the moment? Changing plans led to potential disappointment, dismissed time and energy in planning, and, of course, the “where do you want to go to dinner?” question.

Now, it looks like a weekly date night where we both have the expectation and commitment ahead of time. We talk about where, when and details ahead of time and then show up where we need to. If time, location or date needs to change, then we do, but we both hold the commitment of date night without the spontaneity leading.

Saying yes to too much socially

I love dinners, events, spontaneous plans, date nights, trips, concerts, all of it. The Gemini that I am could spend all night out talking, dancing, and enjoying every second, but then kick myself when I get home wishing I hadn’t.

But I also realized that saying yes to everything started making me feel more drained than fulfilled.

Not because the plans themselves were bad, but because constantly being “on,” always going somewhere, or trying to fit everything in eventually starts catching up with you, especially while balancing work, relationships, routines, and everyday responsibilities.

Ironically, I enjoy the things I do go to much more now that I’m more selective about what actually deserves my energy. Everything compounds and nothing adds up faster than multiple social events a week.

Overcomplicating routines I realistically couldn’t maintain

This one took me longer to realize.

I think there’s so much pressure now to optimize every part of your life. The perfect morning routine, perfect workout split, perfect skincare routine, perfect supplement schedule, perfect productivity system.

And honestly, I think sometimes we create routines for an imaginary version of ourselves instead of our actual life. The Pinterest board of your life feeling. Some mornings it worked and I felt great about it, other times I was asking myself why am I doing this? Do I actually need this?

I realized I didn’t need more steps. I needed simpler ones that I could realistically maintain consistently, even during busy weeks. I then heard a tip about having a bare minimum routine and then a full routine. I was trying to hit the full routine every day when I needed to establish what the minimum bar was.

The full plan is extensive and sometimes overwhelming when you’re running behind, not feeling well, traveling, or adding in appointments.

Once I understood my nonnegotiable steps (the daily stoic and devotional) it became easier to feel like I had still accomplished something without the weight of the entire routine on me.

Letting convenience make too many decisions for me

This one sounds minor, but it changed more than I expected.

I realized how much time, money, and mental energy I was losing to random errands. A grocery run usually turned into buying things we didn’t actually need or were craving in the moment. A stop at Target somehow became another notebook, candle, or organizational product I convinced myself I needed and then it sat in a corner never being used.

And convenience worked the same way with food too. If I was tired, busy, overstimulated, or unprepared, the easiest option usually won and then we realized we’re eating out multiple times a week.

Now I rely much more on grocery pickup, delivery services, online ordering, and planning ahead just enough to remove some of those unnecessary decisions and errands. It helps keep us in the lane of only buying what we actually need.

It’s less stimulating, less impulsive, and honestly just keeps life moving more smoothly.

None of these things were ruining my life or that dramatic individually.

But together, they were adding friction everywhere else.

And I think that’s what I’ve realized most about adulthood, balance, and trying to manage a full life well. Usually it’s not one massive thing making everything feel overwhelming. It’s smaller habits, routines, purchases, expectations, and decisions stacking on top of each other quietly over time.

Life didn’t magically become less busy.

It just started functioning better once I simplified a few things and added structure where I actually needed it.

There’s a version of working in marketing that looks very polished from the outside. It’s very much like marketing itself; the glitzy, best aspects of the role, the fun events and perks. Fast-moving, creative, always something happening. And while that’s true, what makes it actually work day to day tends to be much simpler and much less sexy than people expect. It’s not a long list of tools or a perfectly optimized routine. It’s a handful of things that I come back to consistently because they make everything else easier to manage.

Not necessarily more productive in the traditional sense, but more clear, more focused, and a little more balanced in a role that isn’t always predictable. Below is a peek into a pretty crazy week in the life working in hopsitality marketing.

A Few Things I Actually Rely On

I don’t look at my phone for the first hour of my day

This has been a challenge for me, as a lot of my day-to-day responsibilities in work sit in the digital world. However, waking up and immediately being hit in the face with venue schedules, questions for the day, follow-ups from yesterday, or the to-do list ahead sets the tone for chaos - for me personally. Y’all know I’m a big proponent of the morning routine, and it has been essential for me to start each day level-headed, calm, and focused.

A notebook I use every day
I’ve tried to digitize this more than once, but I always come back to writing things down. Not everything needs to be captured, just what matters. Priorities for the day, notes from meetings, ideas that would otherwise get lost. Being organized in my thoughts, to do list, quick notes, and schedule is something that has, for me, usually had a tie to paper and physically writing them down. My calendar lives digitally as I gave up on physical planners years ago, but there is another lesson there. Know how you work and lean into what feels right.

Uniform dressing
This has made more of a difference than I expected it to. Getting dressed without having to figure it out every morning removes a layer of decision-making that I didn’t realize was adding up. It’s not about repetition; it’s about starting from something that already works. (I shared more on this in a previous post.) I also have been using Rent the Runway for years and love how it helps me plan outfits, provide staples that inform uniform dressing and helps me keep a strong edit on my my own closet.

Project Management Tools
I was introduced to project management tools early in my career in Chicago, and it was one of the first things that meaningfully changed how I worked day to day. I’m an advocate for Asana, which is what my team utilizes. In a field that can be open-ended, fast-paced, and highly creative, having a system creates structure where there otherwise wouldn’t be any.

It’s less about organization for the sake of it, and more about creating clarity. Process-oriented thinking allows us to move quickly without losing direction, and gives balance to work that can easily become reactive.

Using AI as a thinking partner
Not to replace the work, but to support it. Whether it’s organizing ideas, pressure-testing a concept, or getting out of a creative block, it’s become something I use daily. The value isn’t in having it think for you, it’s in helping you think more clearly.

Refinement has been a consistent theme for me lately, and AI has played a large role in that. From early-stage brainstorming to tightening copy, analyzing data, researching audiences, and building out campaign directions, it’s become a tool that allows me to move faster without sacrificing depth.

It’s still somewhat controversial, but there’s a lot of value in expanding your own thinking while allowing something else to handle the legwork. I’ve saved hours of time researching, become more informed within minutes, and challenged my own perspective in ways I wouldn’t have otherwise.

Books I actually reference
Not just reading for the sake of it, but returning to ideas that shape how I approach my work. The kind of books that influence taste, decision-making, and how you see things, not just tactics. In this post, I outline my favorite marketing books and highly recommend any of them. They’re the books that contain concepts I keep returning to, share with my team, and consistently use in the office.

What I Pay Attention To & CONSUME

One thing that’s made a bigger difference than I expected is how much I’m actually consuming the space I work in.

Not in an overwhelming way, but consistently enough that I’m aware of what’s happening, what’s working, and where things are going. That means paying attention across different channels, not just the ones I naturally gravitate toward. Social, brand campaigns, hospitality trends, music, culture, and even how people are interacting with spaces and experiences in real time. It’s less about keeping up and more about building context.

The more you see, the easier it is to recognize patterns. What feels fresh, what feels overdone, what actually resonates with people versus what just looks good on the surface. Over time, that starts to shape your instincts in a way that makes decisions feel more immediate and less forced. Especially in a role where things move quickly, that kind of awareness matters more than having the perfect answer.

Just as important as what I consume is what I don’t. Editing out content, noise, and inputs that don’t serve me has made a noticeable difference. I’m selective about what I follow, what I spend time on, and what I allow into my space. Protecting that, especially mentally, allows me to stay focused and operate at a level that feels consistent.

What Matters More Than Any Tool

All of this helps, but none of it replaces how you show up. If anything, it just supports it. There are a few things that have made a bigger difference than anything I’ve added.

Knowing what deserves your full attention
Not everything does. The faster you can recognize what actually matters in a given moment, the easier it is to move through everything else without feeling pulled in too many directions.

Being clear in your decisions
Indecision tends to create more work than the wrong decision does. The more you trust your judgment, the less time you spend reworking things that were already close.

Letting consistency do more of the work
You don’t need to approach everything as if it’s new. The more you can rely on what already works, whether that’s how you get dressed, how you structure your day, or how you approach your work, the easier everything becomes.

There isn’t one thing that makes a role like this work. It’s a combination of small decisions, repeated often enough that they start to feel automatic. The tools help, but they’re not the point. They just make it easier to show up the way you need to.